It’s fairly late and I should be in bed but I feel very awake for some reason. So I’m going to write.


Time is passing fairly quickly, when it feels like its passing fairly slowly. I’m a bit bored, though when I think about it…it is in a good way. It’s nice to have so much time that you’re not really sure what to do with it, that you can afford to take too long doing things, to just lie in bed resting for 10 to 30 minutes every morning, just because I can. It feels indulgently lazy and thus brilliant.

I’ve mostly been in the kitchen still battling with my bread and being more successful at other things. Today for breakfast I had homemade granola with soya yogurt and a slice of homemade bread toasted with marmite. It felt quite awesome to have half of what is on my plate to have been something I’d made myself, from scratch. For lunch I baked some chicken and had homemade oven fries, which also felt awesome. Basically, apart from too much snacking from aforementioned boredom, I’m managing my diet quite well, and this no dairy thing is coming together nicely. It is really just chocolate to cut out now. only that.

(I really do not know how to stop eating chocolate. :/)

Apart from spending time in the kitchen I’ve been lazing around catching up on all the dramas I’ve wanted to watch but hadn’t the time nor bandwidth during term. I watched “Rinjo” which was better than average, with a truly heart breaking last episode, but there were questions I had about the main characters background that bugged me right until the end, and kind of ruined my enjoyment of the series. I’ve also nearly finished “A sleeping forest” which veers off into the unbelievable at times, but is so tightly plotted you cannot help but get sucked into it. I really have no idea who the culprit is and I watch every episode intently, trying to make sense of it but the drama is brilliant at turning things round, making everything a little unreliable, a little creepy, until you’re full of doubt. It’s exciting and exactly what you want from a mystery- this sort of high tension where you’re resisting the urge to just skip to the last minutes of the last episode just so you can know already! Strangely I’ve not been reading much, compared to how much I had been reading. I find myself struggling to really get into anything though. Maybe it’s the books I’ve been reading? The only books I have on hand are very hefty fantasy books and I’m not quite in the mood for it.


I received my results on Monday. I passed everything, even scraping through telecommunications by a mere 3% above the pass mark. I cannot feel relieved though.  I think my average is enough for the MEng but until I’m transferred I do not think I’ll be able to stop worrying, to be able to quiet this little voice inside me going “what if?” Like always I tell myself to stop worrying, that everything will be OK. But like always I have a hard time being able to believe that. I really have to see it before I can believe it…


I spoke to my dad tonight about my module choices and finally I feel more certain about those, at least. I’m fairly sure what I’m doing, and that more importantly that they will be relevant for my future career. I’m still not certain about one module but I’ve emailed someone at the university about it and so hopefully they’ll be able to advise me, and then that will all be done. Then its just choosing my group project… I wish I wasn’t thinking about university as much as I currently am.


Although I’ve just moved back from Malaysia, or at least it feels that way, I’m already having to think of moving again. By which I mean: accommodation for university next year. And: flat hunting. I’m going to be living by myself next year. And finding a place for one in a decent area for a decent price is somewhat trying. As a young woman living alone I have to be a little paranoid- I have to be careful about the area, and I cannot have any ground floor flats. This naturally narrows the choices down quite a bit and raises the prices quite a bit, too. Thankfully my father agreed to not just focus on furnished flats, which widened the choices a little, and lowered the prices a little, but only marginally. I did eventually manage to find 6 places I am interested in, for which I nervously enquired about viewings. Thus tomorrow I will be driving down with my father to look at the first two places, and then on Saturday I will see the rest with both my father and sister. I am utterly terrified of this. I’ve never done anything like this and have no idea what to expect, or how I’m supposed to act- what do I look for? What questions do I ask? I’m also shy which makes me fairly scared of appearing rude or pushy in front of the estate agent when I know that I should not be so self conscious, not afraid to look into corners, test things out, ask any questions. I know this but I have a feeling I’ll freeze up tomorrow and it’ll all pass me by in a daze and that’s hardly useful is it? Look at these run on sentences, I’m really kind of panicking. That’s probably why I feel so awake.

Some random thoughts:

1. University is still very slow. I don’t want to complain, as I really don’t want labs to start up or for classes to become more intense, but I can feel myself becoming much too lazy. As in, its becoming natural to be lazy, which it should not. Today I had my first class at 3pm and I was late- because i OVERSLEPT. :| I have also not been studying at all, which is terrible.

2. I finished God’s Quiz Season 3 today. I started season 1 towards the end of last week. Talk about an addictive drama. The 3 seasons came together so well, although all three could stand alone. Ryo Duk Hwan is amazing as the eccentric genius Dr Han. The show is flashy but in a highly enjoyable way- its easy to get caught up in the crazy rare diseases and crimes that (sometimes) suspend disbelief. Best of all is the ongoing thread of Dr Han’s mysterious disease. Crazy scientists and their mad schemes are definitely not the most believable of plots but they sure are fun. In season 1 and 2  Ahn Yong Joon was incredible as the deranged genius Ha Yoon and although the mad scientist of Season 3 wasn’t as interesting, the twist of what was happening to Dr Han because of his disease was fascinating and really creepy. I loved how the last episode just turned everything on its head. Was not expecting it AT ALL. The ending was awful though. HOW COULD THEY LEAVE IT THERE. There better be a fourth season coming soon.

3. Whilst on the subject off dramas can I also recommend The Thousandth Man? Its not perfect, but its a lovely attempt at doing something new with the gumiho legend. I just finished re-watching episode 3 which was just so touching.  I struggle to articulate my thoughts on this drama so let me link to this wonderful review. (skip to the end of the post for the review.)

4. I was surprised, and pleased, to find the God’s Quiz OST on amazon for a little over £1 for one song and its instrumental. Sadly their mp3 store is difficult to navigate and I cannot seem to stumble over any other kpop that I would want to purchase. Still,  its nice to know its probably there for a decent price, and without having to wait for anything to ship to me. (And yes I know, for someone my age I am very out of touch with modern ways of getting music. I still exist in the CD age D:)

5. I’ve been eating too much chocolate and junk food lately and generally wasting to much money on food. Food is very cheap in Malaysia, which was great when I first got here, although I was soon made to realize how much of a double edged sword that is. When my cravings for junk food got very bad in the UK I could usually refrain myself because of the price. Now, the food is cheap and 7-Eleven is right there in the center of campus where I pass everyday and … I need to fix this asap. I have a feeling I’ve posted this before, too, which is embarrassing if true. I really am not good at sticking to personal goals.

6. Also embarrassing: I cannot use chopsticks. Yes, I know even 3 year olds can use them these days but no matter how much I have tried in the past I could never get the hang of it. I am going to Japan in June though which has inspired me to properly try and learn. I bought some cheap chopsticks at TESCO and have been trying to eat my food with them, but it gets so frustrating when I am hungry and  I cannot pick up my food that I always end up back to using a fork. Somehow, I don’t think I am going to end up a master of these things by June. :/

Re-watched Noriko goes to Seoul as I wanted something light hearted to pass the time with. The story of this drama isn’t that original but the characters are endearing, and the relationships that form between them are precious. I love that it is not a romance story, but a story about family, friendship and personal growth. The way that Noriko and Min hae’s relationship develops so naturally, from strangers to something like family is really sweet, and it’s touching how they both support and encourage each other, and find confidence in themselves and the things they wish to achieve from that support. There are many co incidences and such that would only exist in a drama, and it definitely exists in the world of fiction where every problem can be fixed, if only you try hard enough. But I like that. It’s a heart warming drama with a good message that I could happily watch a third time even.

Kagi no Kakatta Heya is a really fun drama. That’s not to say it’s flawless. It is a standard mystery drama with all the tropes. Like so many jdrama each episode follows a set formula, and of course it is a mystery drama and therefore refuses to do anything besides the formula of solving the case- so the potential lovelines are teased but never blossom, the characters are never developed outside what is necessary for the case so never quite feel real, and the villains are always willing to talk at the end so that everything can be neatly wrapped up. Despite that the locked room mysteries were quite bizarre and interesting, and the banter between the three leads was truly hilarious at times. (Sato Koichi as Serizawa Gou was particularly entertaining to watch.) Making it overall enjoyable, if not memorable. It’s a quick, entertaining drama. Other things of note: a) the OST was really good and b) the ending was very strange. I think they are setting up a season 2, special or movie but it was still annoying

9 ends 2 out
The description of 9 Ends 2 Out makes it seem like the most boring drama ever, but I finally got bored enough to watch it and found myself marathoning it in a matter of days. Rather than a drama about baseball as the description suggests, it’s actually a really sweet friends-to-lovers story. I loved how realistic it was, with a cast of very ordinary characters living very average lives, without any of the usual kdrama trappings such as rich chaebols, evil mother in laws and bitchy exes. I was surprised to find I didn’t hate a single character or find any of them pointless, like I usually do when I watch dramas. I appreciated that the drama took the time to develop all its characters so that they all became like able and had their place in the story. And the story was wonderful. Hyung Tae’s and Nan Hees friendship was precious and it was lovely watching their growing realization of wanting more, and understandable how they held out until the end of the drama out of the fear of losing such a friendship.

The pacing was fairly slow but rather than getting frustrated, I thought the pacing appropriate, because Hyung Tae and Nan Hee needed that time to sort out their feelings for others, and their lives. I liked the fact that Hyung Tae had a chance to get back with his ex so he could sort out his feelings for her, and how Nan Hees relationship with Jung Joo was never made less by her growing feelings for Hyung Tae. I liked that they lived apart for a while so it was clear that they weren’t just getting confused by living in close quarters. etc etc. It made the ending that much more rewarding when the drama had taken so much time to develop these characters and their lives.

Also, Soo Ae is ridiculously beautiful in this drama. I had to suspend disbelief when her character talks about growing old and getting wrinkles and looking odd next to her 22 year old boyfriend because come on, she’s gorgeous.